As an honours student in journalism, when navigating the challenges of upholding academic rigour and minimising self-doubt, I battle with myself.
Usually when I sit in my journalism lectures, surrounded by talented peers and esteemed professors, I often hear a nagging voice: You do not belong here. It’s a feeling that’s all too familiar: imposter syndrome. The feeling that I am just pretending, and everyone will soon discover my inadequacy.
Imposter syndrome is a phenomenon where individuals doubt their own abilities, despite evidence of their competence. In my own experience, I’ve seen talented students question their own intelligence and capabilities, attributing their achievements to sheer luck or circumstance; rather than their own hard work and dedication.
A study published in the Journal of Student Researchfound that imposter syndrome is a significant predictor of academic anxiety and depression among young graduates.
Personally, I have been guilty of downplaying my own achievements, including my decision to pursue my honours in Journalism. I have often made jokes to my friends that I am only here by some miracle, or that I am just winging it and hoping for the best.
However, the truth is, I have worked incredibly hard to be here, and I have earned my place in this programme. I started to realise that it is time for me to own that; and recognise my achievements are not a result of circumstance, but of my own dedication and perseverance.
I’ve been so hard on myself; but hearing how my close friends and family are proud of me, has helped me to start celebrating my own accomplishments.
As I navigate my own struggles with imposter syndrome, I’ve learned to not take my inner voice too seriously. When self-doubt creeps in, I reflect on my accomplishments — like completing a challenging assignment or receiving positive feedback from a lecturer. By focusing on my strengths and reframing my mindset, I’m building confidence in my abilities and overcoming the grip of imposter syndrome.
I also try not to dwell too much on my mistakes by recoginsing that perusing this degree has offered me the opportunity to learn; while I get to focus on my passion of telling stories. This has helped me to see failure as an opportunity for growth. When I receive constructive criticism or face setbacks, I use it as a chance to learn and improve.
Also, surrounding myself with a supporting community has helped because they see me behind my current struggles. I believe by acknowledging and challenging our own imposter syndrome, we can begin to break down the barriers that hold us back from achieving our full potential, and we can learn to embrace our success. And as we do, we will find that we are more confident, more resilient, and more empowered to make a meaningful impact in the world around us.
Witsies woke up to front page news on Sunday March 3 about accusations of sexual harassment against a senior lecturer, barely three weeks after the university marched against sexual violence.
Tsepo Wa Mamatu, deputy head of dramatic arts, is at the centre of a string of allegations of rape and sexual abuse brought to the Sunday Times by former students. It also emerged that Xoli Norman, an academic contracted to teach at Wits, faced allegations of sexual harassment at another university before his appointment.
After Wits Vuvuzela published an article about a lecturer sexually harassing students last year, it received accusations against two other lecturers before the Sunday Times’ expose. As the news spread onTwitter, some students suggested that sexual harassment on campus is a bigger problem than previously thought.
Students who had known about these allegations or had nearly fallen prey to lecturers themselves heaved a collective sigh of relief at the publicity this story “finally” received.
Tsepo wa Mamatu drama lecturer at WITS FINALLY in the news, exposed for rape and sexual assault!!! Front page, Sunday Times.Toxic Lex
And my Facebook is a cacophony of Varsity friends, men and women, screaming "FINALLY!" We all knew & yet none of us knew how to speak it.Marie Straub
Thanks to all the girls I know who came forward to report this shit. Brave. We all know what happened. Now they know. #TsepoWaMamatu Toxic Lex
@the_lombz And we should all be ashamed for pretending and ignoring it just to keep the peace #SELL_ITZanele Madiba
@MissMadiba nt shocked hey. He was always dodgey! His classes revolved around sex. I even took him to task once, sick man.Sarah Jackson
Meanwhile all the other predators at Wits are looking up to the sky & thanking their lucky stars that its not them dat were caught out.SMH!Nomonde_Ndwalaza
Some Dramatic Arts graduates said the rehearsal space particularly made it easier for lecturers to take advantage of students. Wa Mamatu told the Sunday Times: “what happens in a rehearsal space is private and confidential. I can’t break that confidentiality”.
@troyevillelolly Rehearsal space is sacred. Has to be. You have to be able to push boundaries. Always those who will take advantage of such.Marie Straub
I make no excuses for Wa Matu, I’m just saying the problem is bigger than one individual. The rehearsal space is one of great vulnerabilitymegan godsell
@merrystrwberry Mostly, I remember holding other terrified 20 year olds who were crying and trying to figure out ‘how far was too far’megan godsell
You had to be willing to tell your teacher ‘NO’ in the strongest terms. Repeatedly. Knowing it’d cost you a good 10% come exams.Marie Straub
‘NO’ I will not hump that chair, because that’s NOT a breathing exercise.Marie Straub
‘NO’ I will not do this monologue naked just because you’d like an extra image for your wank-bank.Marie Straub
Two former students also related personal accounts of how lecturers tried to take advantage of them, including during the rehearsal of a rape scene.
I did a piece with two classmates. Lecturer said: "That was so powerful. Now imagine if you set it in a bathroom & you 3 girls were naked."Marie Straub
We were told we were brilliant, but our unwillingness to "go all the way" would cost us marks. He was disappointed we hadn’t got naked.Marie Straub
Eventually, as a ‘fuck you’ to the lecturer, we set it in a bathroom as requested. But wore robes. Scene in no way required nudity.Marie Straub
@merrystrwberry Amen! The shy scarred 20 year old who had to kiss a girl in his class ‘for an exercise’is dancing now! #WITSsexualpredatorsmegan godsell
In my time at Wits Drama school I encountered many wonderful, honourable lecturers, male and female. These assholes were the exceptionmegan godsell
But, there is this to say. I was a student at Wits Drama. Tsepo was a few years ahead. He started as a lecturer in my final year. BUTmegan godsell
during my(and his)time as a student, there was a lecturer sexually harrassing the female students. He would pick a female student every yearmegan godsell
and focus his attention on her. A first year, every year, and in my year it was my friend. He was fired for this, eventually, quietly andmegan godsell
without any open reprimand or repercussion from the university.He is still a known and respected playwright. And the techniques practiced bymegan godsell
Tsepo are techniques this guy used all the time. So the precedent for this behaviour is set and accepted at Wits Drama School.megan godsell
@merrystrwberry I still remember the really awful abuse and harrassment on Brett Bailey’s MEDEiA. The director, also guest lecturing, usedmegan godsell
@merrystrwberry an emotional and deeply sexual script to dominate and fuck with a huge female cast and would remind us that he was gay ifmegan godsell
@merrystrwberry we complained. He once pulled a male actor out of a rape scene and put himself in with the female lead to ‘show’ how it wasmegan godsell
@merrystrwberry done. Process is process, rehearsals need to be a safe and sacred space, but just that. This Confidentiality is bullshitmegan godsell
Wa Mamatu was placed on “special leave” by the university and denied all the allegations brought forward. Some of Wa Mamatu’s friends and colleagues expressed shock at the front page news.
I’m at a loss for tweets today. Tsepo wa Mamatu is a friend of mine. I’ve not gone past that story today. Not looking forward to #TalkAtNineEusebius McKaiser
Spent today thinking about my friends, ex-colleagues & the students I taught for 7 1/2 years at Wits Drama. I’m shocked by today’s news.Theatre…and stuff.
I hope that swift action will be taken to restore the integrity of Wits Drama. My thoughts are with everyone connected to today’s news.Theatre…and stuff.
Higher ed institutions must be a safe space where students learn. This situation is sad, appalling, and embarrassing http://www.timeslive.co.za/local/2013/03/03/senior-wits-lecturer-accused-of-being-sexual-predatorDavid J Hornsby
Wits started a campus-wide investigation into sexual harassment on campus last year. Some said ‘naming and shaming’ remains a powerful way to combat the problem.
Screw this ‘we know these people’, shit, abuse is abuse. We need to stop protecting these preditors. Witsies must come out about Tsepo!Zanele Madiba
I urge ALL Wits drama students present and past to speak up. Please call Wits with your stories. I suspect it’s worse. Your story counts.kgomotso matsunyane
@khadijapatel glad someone was named this time around…that doesn’t happen in these type of stories.Zamantungwa Khumalo
@Margaritamojo @Witsvuvuzela What else can it do? Wits needs evidence and ppl now need to come forward.Shirona
Related Stories
Senior Wits lecturer accused of being sexual predator – Times LIVETen former students have alleged that Tsepo wa Mamatu, 33, deputy head of dramatic arts, sexually assaulted and violated them during rehe…
Are you a rapist, my brilliant friend? – The Star | IOL.co.zaRelated Stories Yesterday I woke up to a horror story. In fact, I am still in emotional wilderness as I type this column. I even feel gui…
Report sex pests: WitsACTION against university sexual harassers can only be taken when victims report the cases to authorities, warns the Careers Counselling …
Professor asked students for sexKatlego* perches on a wall outside the Cullen Library, an old Nokia in her hand. She shields the screen against the sun, so that the mess…
Tiptoeing Around Sexual Harassment Will Get You Nowhere, Wits.Image Credit: "Queerrell: A Voice Against Gender Violence" Dear Wits, I was initially excited to hear that you released a public statemen…
Wits staff unions will resume their dispute over salaries with Wits management on Monday February 11, even though staff received two raises within the last 7 months.
The Academic Staff Association of Wits University (Asawu) suspended the dispute shortly before the start of last year’s final exams “in the interest of students”, and to negotiate with the newly-appointed members of management “in good faith”. Union members went on strike twice last August after negotiations for improved salaries, improved working conditions and more research funding deadlocked. They had demanded a 9% increase for support staff and payment for academics on the 75th percentile, which is the three-quarter mark in the range of salaries in the higher education sector.
[pullquote align=”right”]“Staff are earning significantly less in January 2013 than they were earning in December 2012.”[/pullquote]
The Wits Council granted a 7.55% increase for academics and 6.8% for support staff in June 2012, and an additional 4% increase for all in January 2013. The yearly bargaining cycle was changed from June to January, meaning Wits will give staff their next raise in January 2014.
Error: Insufficient funds
Liz Picarra, Asawu vice-president, said management’s latest offer has not matched the costs of working at Wits. Parking and medical aid fees increased this year as they do annually.
“With these increases in medical aid and parking, academic and support staff are earning significantly less in January 2013 than they were earning in December 2012,” Picarra said.
But Yule Banda, Wits’ Human Resource manager, said the medical aid fee increase came with more benefits and was below the national benchmark. He added that while medical aid fees went up for 2013 alone, the salary increases covered an 18-month period.
In a statement, Asawu described the January salary increase as an imposition on its members that was made without consulting itself or support staff union, the National Education, Health and Allied Workers Union (Nehawu).
[pullquote align=”right”]“You have to deal with the problem of renumeration and financial incentives.”[/pullquote]
Unions’ faith in new management team
It welcomed the announcement of Prof Adam Habib as Wits’ next vice-chancellor in December, and hopes he will work to unite the “fractured Wits community”.
Habib said he played a big role in salary negotiations at the University of Johannesburg, where he was a deputy vice-chancellor, in his public address during the appointments process in November. He proposed a “university pact”: an alliance between staff, students and alumni that will investigate how best to manage their demands.
Habib said it is a vice-chancellor’s responsibility to attract and retain top academic talent from competing universities.
“You have to deal with the problem of remuneration and financial incentives. If you bury your head in the sand and say the academy is an equal socialist space, you will never attract the kinds of people you need.”
Wits has commissioned a fact-finding inquiry into last year’s salary negotiation process which will be externally headed by Mark Antrobus, SC. It is expected to recommend ways to improve future negotiations.
Published in Wits Vuvuzela 1st edition, 6th February, 2013.
Katlego* perches on a wall outside the Cullen Library, an old Nokia in her hand. She shields the screen against the sun, so that the message is visible.
“Hope you will turn me into your personal slave,” one message reads. “Make me serve you and then reward me!”
“Whatever we might agree would be totally secret and safe with no strings attached,” says another. These messages are from Katlego’s lecturer.
“I remember the first time he sent me an SMS. He said something very explicit,” Katlego says.
She called the number back twice, not knowing who it was. There was no answer. “That’s when he sent an SMS, he was like, ‘Don’t call me, let’s just chat via SMS.’”
Katlego had never given him her number, and was initially surprised that he had managed to get hold of it. “But then I realised that he’s a lecturer. He can just look up my name and get my number.”
Katlego says she never considered reporting him. “It was so overwhelming; I thought, ‘OK, I’m just going to brush it off.’ I was a first year student, I didn’t want to jeopardise anything, didn’t want to get into trouble for getting a lecturer into trouble.
“I brushed him off. I told him look, you need to stop. He just said, ‘You can’t handle me, you can’t handle my attention’. But I told him that I was losing all respect for him as my lecturer. And I stopped replying to his SMSes.
“A man his age, it was really disturbing. Have you seen him on campus? He walks with his head down. He knows, he knows he’s surrounded by victims.”
Samantha’s* story
Samantha* had a similar experience in her first year, when the same lecturer invited her to be his friend on Facebook. “He invited a couple of us black females on Facebook, including myself, lots of my friends. He sent one of my friends something really, really, really nasty. There are so many girls that I know. Actually more than six.
“If you ask any black girl who did [the subject] at some stage, they’ll tell you. He approaches everyone,” says Samantha.
Wanting to expose the lecturer, Samantha spoke to her friends, asking them to come forward. But they refused. “My other friend sat me down and said, ‘You don’t want to be that girl. You don’t want to be that girl that exposes the lecturer. You don’t want that reputation.’”
Samantha was unwilling to let Wits Vuvuzela see the messages the lecturer had sent her on Facebook, although she had kept them.
“He’d remember. He’d probably check all the girls he inboxed, and then he’d know. I want to do honours [in the department], so I’m not going to do that.”
However, Samantha is quick to praise the professor. “He’s such a good lecturer, honestly. He’s making changes in the department, good changes.”
Despite this, she admits that his advances on the young women that he lectures are “bad”.
“For me, it’s no big deal because nothing happened, I didn’t entertain it. But what if I was failing, what if I was poor? What does it mean for those girls?”
Ayanda’s* story
Yet another student, Ayanda*, has also been approached by the Wits lecturer. In her case, it was via Yahoo Chat. Ayanda claims that she wasn’t the only student approached by the lecturer, and she has friends who had a similar experience.
“He asks how you are and if you are interested in him. If not, he doesn’t mind. He doesn’t want a relationship, just sex. He has a relationship already.
“At first it was just creepy then it became sad. I honestly thought it was a joke, but jokes don’t continue for months.”
In response to Wits Vuvuzela, the lecturer in question has denied the allegations and said: “There are appropriate channels within the university for dealing with cases of sexual discrimination and harassment”.
A complaint can be laid with one of the counsellors at the Careers Development Unit (CCDU), after which “the process will be driven/guided by the needs and wishes of the complainant”, according to the unit’s sexual harassment policy.
The CCDU’s definition of sexual harassment is “any form of unwanted sexual advance, [which] can include physical, verbal or non-verbal behaviour”.
The student laying the complaint can choose not to pursue any process involving the alleged harasser, to get counselling, follow a process of mediation, or lay a formal internal complaint, resulting in a formal grievance and/or disciplinary process.
Can lecturers date their students?
Contrary to popular belief, relationships between lecturers and students are not explicitly forbidden.
The Wits human resources department has compiled a set of “guidelines” for lecturer-student relationships, which states:
“[F]or instance in the development of a romantic relationship, a staff member should consider carefully the possible consequences for him/herself and the student. Consensual romantic relationships with student members, while not expressly prohibited, can prove problematic.”
Wits Vuvuzela is investigating cases of sexual harassment that students have brought to our attention. If you have any information, please contact us at editor@witsvuvuzela.com.
Wits Vuvuzela will protect the identity of all its sources.
*Names have been changed.
Published in Wits Vuvuzela 25th edition, September 21 2012.
The two aggrieved Wits staff unions do not need to embark on an indefinite strike, says Administration, Library and Technical Staff Association (Altsa) president Adele Underhay.
Underhay met with Altsa members on Wednesday to update them on negotiations with Wits management. Altsa signed the 2012 wage agreement the day before the second union strike in August. This left the Academic Staff Association of Wits University (Asawu), and the National Education, Health and Allied Workers’ Union (Nehawu) deadlocked with management.
“We felt that management came back and they had moved considerably on a lot of issues,” Underhay said.
The three unions jointly declared a dispute with management in May over a range of grievances, most notably salary increases.
On the morning of the second strike, some Altsa members expressed disappointment with union leadership for “breaking ranks”.
Underhay said she tried to be reasonable, although her point of view may be shifting.
“We need to get new blood into the negotiating team … maybe I’m not seeing things clearly anymore, maybe I’ve been in it too long.”
Asawu gave its members the option to vote for an indefinite strike as a way forward but they chose to boycott administrative meetings. It also considered suspending the strike until next year, when there will be new members of senior management.
“It is clear that the current management plans to talk itself out of office and make the problem that of the next administration. The unions have now run through the entire Wits senior leadership and it is clear that there is nobody with whom negotiations can reasonably take place,” the Wits Joint Union spokesperson said.
Prof Rob Moore, deputy vice-chancellor: advancement and partnerships, said management was committed to resolving the dispute “as quickly as possible”, and was grateful that strikes had not caused further disruption of academic activities.
Published in Wits Vuvuzela 25th edition, 21st September 2012
David Hornsby, International Relations lecturer who chaired the debate (left), with Prof Rob Moore, Deputy Vice Chancellor: Advancement and Partnerships.
The dispute between Wits management and unions is not a short-term fix, and should be addressed “very consciously and deliberately” by incoming members of the Senior Executive Team, according to Prof Rob Moore.
The Deputy Vice Chancellor (DVC): Advancement and Partnerships was speaking at a Leadership Forum, organised by the Academic Staff Association of Wits University (ASAWU) on Monday, to debate the type of leadership needed at Wits.
The SET will undergo major changes soon, with the DVC: Academic, Prof Yunus Ballim, and the DVC: Finance and Operations, Prof Patrick Fitzgerald, vacating their offices at the end of this year.
Vice Chancellor Prof Loyiso Nongxa will end his extended five-year term in May 2013, and his post has been advertised as a vacancy.
Speaking in his personal capacity, Moore said the dispute had created a stressful time, but it was commendable that academics could have heated debates with management in Senate meetings, and still enjoy tea and sandwiches “in a perfectly amiable manner at tea time”.
Witsies at the forum said the new members of the SET needed to focus as much on the practical needs of the university as they would on strategic planning.
Pontsho Pilane, 1st year BA, said the ideal vice chancellor was someone who had been a student and a lecturer long enough to know what the “gist” of Wits was.
“We need a leader who values the fact that the academic staff and students run the university, and if it wasn’t for them, there wouldn’t be a Wits University.”
The race is on
Short-listed candidates for the DVC: Academic post delivered public presentations on Tuesday.
Prof Kuzvinetsa Dzvimbo, currently Executive Dean of the College of Education at the University of South Africa, said he was “very, very” interested in having a childcare facility for staff use on campus: a joint demand by Wits’ three unions in the current dispute.
Dzvimbo, who holds degrees from Sierra Leonean and Nigerian universities, said Wits needed to strengthen its relationships with other universities on the continent.
Prof Tahir Pillay, former Deputy Vice Chancellor at the University of KwaZulu-Natal, said Wits must also look eastwards, and not forget that all of the top 100 universities are not in Europe and North America.
Prof Andrew Crouch, Dean of Science, said Wits was nearing the end of a phase of heavy infrastructural investment (R1.5bn in the past few years), and needed to build “academic proficiency on top of that infrastructure”.
President Cyril Ramaphosa recently signed the Expropriation Act which resulted in President Donald Trump posting a tweet about how the South African government is confiscating land from certain classes of people, therefore he will stop all future funding for South Africa as this, according to him is a human rights violation. In this episode, Siyanda […]